i have some of the most interesting friends. they are scattered across the country - some throughout the world - and the list of them isn't terribly long ... but they are mine. they are the ones who know me for me. they have experienced the good, bad, mean, terribly ugly, super annoying, and painfully funny alli turner. some i haven't seen in years ... and even still, when my phone rings at 8:13 in the morning and their name flashes across my screen, i don't hesitate even a second to accept the call and talk and talk and talk about love, life, vices, pain, memories, new places, government conspiracies, new projects, new boys (and girls), new jobs, new cars, new hair, new pets, discouragements, loneliness, family and ... everything.
i love them.
with the deepest affection i have yet given to anyone in this world (along with my family), i love them. they brighten my spirit when i am sad and lonely. they show me that i am not crazy or alone in my thoughts and memories and beliefs. most of all, they remind me of who i am. when i have been living in the midst of struggle and neglect of my real self ... i can speak with or spend time with one of them, and when i hang-up or drive away i think, "oh yeah, that's me. that's the alli i want to be. that's who i really am. they are the ones i know and love ... the ones who know and love me." and all is right in the world.
this morning i spoke with one of these friends.
we haven't seen each other in over 2 years. he called me and provided me with the perfect way to start my day ... laughs and a reminder that there are people out there who i fit with. when the conversation ended i was flooded with hundreds of memories of our time spent together living in italy. what silly, fun, hilarious and incredibly meaningful memories they are.
we've spoken lots of times throughout the five years that we've been friends. we've made trips and had sleepovers and eaten short dinners together. it's interesting to see the different phases of life that people go through. to see and talk with them over the years and see how their thoughts and life philosophies and happiness changes. this time he was happy. a true kind of happy. i could hear it inside of him. he is one of the smartest people i know. he knows so much about so much and never shys away from sharing his knowledge. i love hearing him talk about things. he is passionate and intense about things that matter, and never makes me feel foolish for not understanding. he's ever-ready to explain and break things down so others can understand his ideas. he is confident in who he is and his person never changes ... he is steady and reliable. he is the furthest thing from judgmental that i have ever known in a person. he accepts and loves people and will share and talk for hours with anyone who will be real with him. he values those he loves beyond everything else.
he is good ... to the core.
i love him.
thanks, benj, for being my friend.
there are a few more members of My Crew.
in t-minus 3 days i will be vacationing in portalnd, oregon with two more of them.